DAUGHTER TO MOTHER

I’ve been doing some research on the important relationship dynamics that are affected when a daughter becomes a mother. I’m so intrigued by this! I will be deep-diving into this topic for our Awakened Mother online teachings but for now I leave you with this little note to reflect on....

“If you ask any woman to name her most important relationships, she will usually list those within her immediate family, such as her husband or children. Push her a little more, and you’ll often find that the next most important relationship will be with her mother.

When a woman becomes a mother herself, this can mark a significant change in that relationship: her own mother may once again play a central role in her life. At a time when they are making their own transition from daughter to mother, this change in their relationship with their own mother is something many women grapple with.

The relationship is so important that a number of authors suggest that it helps shape the new mother’s identity. Starting during pregnancy, a woman re-evaluates herself against her mother, as she finds her new place in the world. Through successive life-course transitions, daughters become increasingly empathetic towards their mother, with the transitions of marriage and birth of a first child being particularly significant.

Much of the research into the mother- daughter relationship has looked at where it goes wrong. So much so that it could be assumed that every mother-daughter relationship is in difficulty, but we know from our groups that this is simply not true. Even the best relationships go through a transition at this time, however. Some women will want to explore their changing relationships and feelings towards their mother, as there can be tensions as well as greater identification as they adjust to their new place in the family.

Where there has been estrangement or bereavement the new mother must grieve the loss of her own mother anew, even if she felt she had already gone through the grieving process. This can be as true for a woman who has recently lost her mother as one who lost her some years ago.” ~ www.nct.org.uk